June 29th (caffeine vs glory)

The unbeatable combination of caffeine and glory meant today ranked as “mildly ok” instead of “unnervingly below average”. Although not always consumed in equal proportions, it’s often difficult to discern where one ends and the other begins. First in line was Twinings, in an attempt to make myself feel distinguished.

After a morning routine which took three hours for no plausible reason, I headed down to Hillsborough, first to cash in some money at the Post Office, to bring about accounting bliss. I often accumulate disturbingly large wads of cash, misrepresentative of my financial situation, as a result of overseeing our house finances, and maybe a few drug deals here and there. After that, I did some cleaning.

Then headed off to Ecclesall Road. After a wardrobe malfunction, involving a gilet, a cotton hood and stuffy wetness, I called an emergency pit stop at home, where umbrella and water bottle were acquired, bringing inner and outer hydration into balance. Saw Gethin in Couch, which involved revelations about yin yang; the need for a balance of the abstract and tangible, illusion and reality. This was followed by some inner reflection, the only definite result being my recognition that I have no idea how to navigate my internal world. Help me, Christopher Columbus.

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